I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who commented on my blog for the marathon. It truly was an ego boost and the past few months for me have been rough, so actually achieving something like this that not just anyone can do really helped me. I guess that is a quality I obtain... I run for all different reasons... but running to ease pain and anger and hurt is a huge role I play! So maybe these times of hardship have really intensified my running.
Also I wanted to add that I am going to San Diego after I graduate in May to run the Rock and Roll marathon. My closest friend was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma. We both joined an organization called Team in Training (TNT). They are a big fund raising org. and one of the events they participate in is this marathon in San Diego! So why not treat myself as a graduation present to a beautiful vacation and do something good while I am there?
Run To Stand Still
http://lisaraewinant.blogspot.com/
Am I getting anywhere?
Why do I feel like I’m going a hundred miles an hour? Why are things going every which way but the way they are supposed to? Do I just not understand myself? I feel as though every single day is getting harder and more confusing. Does this happen to everyone? Does it ever stop? Will I ever feel good about the way things are in my life?
I look down the road and see that I can be happy, but I think I am happy now too. I’m just becoming an independent. I am figuring things out on my own. They just seem chaotic as I figure them out. In the end I’m still me no matter how things end up aren’t I? I ran the distance to see that I might go through changes but I will always be me. I have learned so far that becoming a young adult and deciding for you is not easy. We want the best for ourselves and our future but determining what is the best is what life is all about. We won’t get it right to first time, or the second time or maybe even the 10th time, but we learn from them and seek alternate routes when need be. One way or another we will find our place in the world but it won’t be easy. Life will never be easy. It takes you around in all directions, it shows you all different outcomes and sooner or later one of those outcomes is the one for you. You just have to decide when to stop running from them all.
The closer I get to entering into the Real world feels like falling off the edge of the world if there were one and getting nowhere. I’m breathing and panting heavily but here is no air at times. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. I hype myself up because I don’t have all the answers, but who does? This life is a running marathon; you know that all this suffering will soon come to an end, but getting there takes all the endurance you have. Use every bit of that endurance and you an dI will finally see the light where it never shined for us before.
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4 comments:
Very impressive Stacy, I run to keep in shape for golf(I know 80% of people won't believe that, and wonder why I need to keep in shape for golf) and I know how hard it is just to run 3 or 4 miles a marathon is an amazing feat.
Color me jealous, lol. Marathone running is huge (or so I've heard) and a very impressive feat. Good job and I hope you have fun in San Diego! Get a little extra sun for me!
I just read all of your posts and I have a few things to say really quickly. Firts, congrats on the marathon. I, too, run but have only completed a 10k. I swore to myself I would do a mrathon before I turn 40. We'll see. I know how grueling that must be. Second, you seem like an amazing girl. Don't feel as though you have to come up with a life plan right now simply because you are graduating. Life takes so many turns and you need to be ready to always make adjustments. Based on some of the things you wrote, I think you have that capacity. Embrace that quality. It will come in handy. Third, great idea on the trip west. Enjoy every minute of it! BTW - I have been to Italy. You will SO COMPLETELY LOVE IT!!!
Congratulations on finishing your marathon. I know it was painful, but you made it. You deserve to feel satisfaction for that accomplishment. It was a huge one! I'm glad you'll be treating yourself in San Deigo. Good for you.
In your most recent blog you wrote that life doesn't get easier. Life may not get easier, but I think you get better at dealing with the crazy things life throws at you. My early 20s were probably the hardest for me. I did a lot of changing--had a lot of growing pains--and I had trouble figuring out who I was. The best advice I got when I was your age was to enjoy the journey. I followed that advice. I didn't want to sacrifice everything and then hate it once I got there. So, hey, enjoy your journey!
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